WWE Smackdown (5/23/02)

WWE Smackdown

BankcorpSouth Center

Tupelo, MS

May 23, 2002

Commentators: Michael Cole & Tazz

Ring Announcer: Tony Chimel

Judgment Day was just days ago and we have a new WWE Champion in The Undertaker. The rumor is Hulk Hogan is going to retire so that may be the main focus tonight. Kurt Angle lost a hair vs hair match to Edge and people want to see what he looks like bald headed. HHH defeated Chris Jericho in the Hell in A Cell match and apparently Vince McMahon isn't too happy with Hunter (in storyline). We're on the road to King of The Ring so let's get started. We start of with a vignette recap of Judgment Day and Hulk Hogan claiming he's going to retire. We get right to our first match.

Match 1

Triple H vs Lance Storm

Cole during the intro says there's no way HHH is 100% after Hell In A Cell on Sunday. Storm on the mic wants to be serious for a minute and runs down HHH, calling him a barbaric, bloodthirsty animal. Hunter wastes no time and clotheslines him immediately before rallying with right hands and a running high knee. Hunter hits a short-armed clothesline but Storm hits a jawbreaker. Storm does a Savage Special, snapping Hunter off the top rope. Lance puts the boots to HHH and drops him with a right hand. HHH counters with a knee to the jaw and a blatant choke. Storm counters with a dropkick and rams his head into the buckle. Lance elbows HHH in the head and whips him off the corner. Lance stomps on HHH's head and chokes him with his boot on the first rope. Cole hypes up Hogan's retirement as Storm rallies with right hands another choke with his boot. HHH is busted wide open and Storm rallies with right hands on the floor. Storm covers for 1...2..no. Lance chokes HHH on the second rope and hits a slingshot clothesline, and its a good one, covering for 1...2...no. Storm goes after the open wound with right hands as Cole once again says Hogan is going to retire. That's gotta be Vince in his ear to ignore the ring like that. Storm misses a charge in the corner and HHH hits the reverse neckbreaker, followed by a spine buster. HHH covers for 1....2...no. Hunter sends Lance off the ropes but Lance ducks the line, superkicking him in the face. Storm locks in a half crab but Hunter makes it to the ropes. Lance hits a second superkick and goes up to the top rope. HHH shoves referee Mike Chioda into the rope to crotch Lance off of it. HHH hits the pedigree and covers for 1...2....3 to win the match. Damn good opener for 5 minute crash style and HHH had to cheat to beat Storm since he was still exhausted from HIAC. Good stuff by both guys.

Time of match: 5:50

Winner: HHH by pinfall

Christian is backstage with Kurt Angle but Angle's head isn't shown. Kurt has Christian touch his medals to show that he didn't get them without courage. Christian says the fans won't be chanting "You suck" they'll be chanting "You're bald." Naturally the crowd starts chanting it as Christian goes "Baldly...handsome...in a manly way...." before leaving. Christian and Angle never ceases to be funny. 

Back from break we get Test and Stacy Kiebler backstage. Stacy says Vince McMahon needs a favor from Test and he says he doesn't do the favors Stacy usually does. Stacy says Vince is jealous of Randy Orton and Stacy puts over how great Randy looks. Stacy says Vince wants Test to take him out and Test says sure, but he'll take care of Stacy first. He kisses her and she goes along with it. Guess we got Test/Orton later.

Here's Kurt Angle for a conference...and he's wearing a wig underneath amateur wrestling headgear. HA! Kurt goes on to say it was a miracle when he won a gold medal with a broken neck but growing his hair back was a bigger one. "Its amazing what hair supplements can do these days." Kurt says he grew his hair out just for kicks and says you won't see a bald headed loser crying in the middle of the ring. Then stops and says "Well there's always Hulk Hogan later tonight." Kurt says Edge's victory was a fluke and he won't be an object of ridicule. He's going to go use some hair mousse...but wait! Here comes Maven for some reason. Maven says there's no shame in being bald and says its not that bad. He says Kurt may even look better bald, just take the wig off. Maven says his fans won't make fun of him and fans want to see him in his natural state. Kurt "Excuse me? Do I know you? Do you work here or something? Oh, you're that guy who won a contract from MTV." Kurt says he's THE Kurt Angle and says if Maven wants the wig off so badly, come remove it yourself. Maven accepts the challenge and hits the ring...only he's cut off by Angle with an axehandle smash. Kurt puts the sneakers to Maven but Maven hits a dropkick. Maven damn near rips the wig off but Angle counters with a german suplex. Angle goes to leave but Edge hits the ring to try his luck. He almost has it off but Christian runs down to save Kurt. The heels leave with the wig still on as Edge and Maven laugh at them as we got to break.

One of the commercials is the 7-11 slurpee cup featuring WWE superstars. Rob Van Dam bullies some kid into using his cup before handing others out. Back from break Stacy Keibler is dancing on the announce table but the camera angle is in front of her. You failed, Kevin Dunn. Stacy plays with Tazz who tries to play it cool much to Michael Cole's dismay. Uh oh...here comes Test for the next match.

Match 2

Test vs Randy Orton

Cole says the new show Velocity's main event this Saturday night will be Bra & Panties for the Women's title Stacy Keibler vs Trish Stratus. That's one way to draw a crowd. Stacy joins Tazz and Cole for the commentary as Michael asks Stacy why she's smitten with Orton. She says what she does with her own time is her own business. Test wants a hand shake at the bell but then slaps Orton when he reaches for it. Test put the boots to Orton and rams Randy's head into the buckle. Test unloads on Orton with elbows and boots before heaving him over the top rope to the floor. Tazz says he must be motivated due to kissing Stacy and she's shown on camera smiling. Orton rallies with two dropkicks but eats a knee to the ribs. Test hits the pump handle slam and covers for 1...2..nope, Test pulled him up. Test punches away at Orton as Cole announces we got a tag team match later, Edge & Maven vs Christian and Kurt Angle...saw that one coming. Test goes for the big boot but Orton moves, causing Test to crotch himself. Test hops up and down and Orton drops him with two clotheslines. Orton hits a running forearm and goes for the top rope crossbody. Test cuts him off but Orton shoves him off anyway. Orton hits the cross body but Test rolls through, hooking the tights for 1...2....no. Orton slugs away at Test but Test goes for the pump handle slam. Orton rolls out of it and cradles up Test for 1...2...nope. Test sends Orton into the ring post but Orton rolls out of the way, cradling Test for 1...2...nope. Test goes for the full nelson slam but Orton turns it into a victory roll for 1...2...no. Test hits Cross Rhodes and covers for 1...2....3 to win the match. Stacy says her work here is done but Tazz doesn't want her too. "Cole, get outta here. Put Stacy over here" Hahaha! Serviceable match featuring the big man trying to intimidate the rookie with Orton using speed to outhustle. Orton is definitely the future, just needs the right gimmick.

Time of match: 3:31

Winner: Test by pinfall

Coming up later, Hulk Hogan's farewell address. Back from commercial we're sent to Mark "Dorkus Malorkus" Lloyd with WWE Champion The Undertaker. Lloyd says his title win has had serious rammifications. Taker cuts him off and says he told the world he would be the judge, jury and executioner of Hogan/Hulkamania and he was. He says he's the best in the world and alone at the top of the ladder. He says several superstars aspire to be the man and they have to look him in the eye and take the title from him, he doesn't think anyone can. Lloyd says on Raw, he lost the title to Rob Van Dam and Taker goes "Who??" We're shown the highlight from Raw where RVD hit rolling thunder and pinned Taker for the championship, only for Flair to reverse the decision and restart the match since Taker's foot was on the rope. Taker won with the match restarted and we're back with Lloyd. Taker "Your point is?" Yeah really...his foot was on the rope, match shouldn't have ended that way. Taker "The match....continued!" He says he's the champion if that's alright with Mark. He says he's here tonight to see the death of Hulkamania. Not too many people have multiple ppv wins over Hulk Hogan let alone for the WWE championship.

We cut to Rico admiring his Tag Team Championship belt when Billy & Chuck walk in. They ask what's going on and Rico says his victory was a fluke. He's champion by default and it kills him to wear the belt because it doesn't go with any of his clothes. Yeah, way to put over the prestige of the belt. Rico says he'll prove he's in favor of Billy & Chuck and they hug it out....with Billy & Chuck giving each other a look. They leave and Rico goes back to admiring the belt.

We cut to Chris Jericho who runs into Faarooq. Chris says he's just the guy he's looking for. Faarooq "Are you high? Or drunk? Or did you get hit in the head too many times at Hell In A Cell?" Jericho says he got the beating of his life on HIAC and he can see why Mick Foley retired after he was in it. He doesn't want to wrestle tonight and wants to buy Faarooq's protection. Jericho says name his price to take his place and Faarooq says to pay attention. He asks what that means and Mark Henry bumps into Jericho, HE'S his opponent. The crowd pops and Jericho visibly looks like his heart just sank. We got to break and when we come back, its time for the tag match.

Match 3

Edge & Maven vs Kurt Angle and Christian.

If you're gonna have a one night story filler match, not the worst to have Edge, Angle and Christian involved. Christian heads to the ring but backs off, waiting for Kurt. Hahaha nice touch. Cole spots Kurt and says "Look at this fool!" Kurt attacks Edge at the bell and stomps away at him. Edge hits a spinning heel kick and the Edgecution. Edge goes to take the wig off but Christian tags in. Christian stomps away at Edge but Edge slides under him, hitting a flapjack. Edge unloads with right hands on Christian, tagging in Maven. Maven gets kicked in the head but hits a spinning heel kick. From the back, Torrie Wilson and Trish Stratus are watching the match. Torrie was dating Maven (on screen) so it makes sense why she'd be watching, but why Trish? Maven runs into an overhead belly to belly suplex and Christian executes a side backbreaker. Christian covers for 1...2..no. Christian stomps on Maven and chops him in the corner. He taunts Edge for the ref distraction allowing Kurt to choke Maven. Kurt tags in and drops Maven with a right hand, taunting Edge in the process. He baits Edge into the ring and Maven hits a low blow with the ref not looking, hahahahahahaha! Perfect! Tazz and Cole are surprised as Kurt and Maven make the tags. Edge cleans house of Angle and drops Christian. Edge backdrops Christian and Angle then hits Edge-O-Matic on Christian. Edge covers for 1...2...no, Kurt makes the save. Edge hits a double clothesline and makes the tag to Maven. Kurt hits the Angle Slam on Edge but turns around into a DDT by Maven. Maven goes to the top rope and hits a missile dropkick on Christian. He covers for 1...2...no, Kurt makes the save. Kurt hits a german suplex on Maven but turns around into a face plant by Edge. Edge spears Christian but is backdropped to the floor by Angle. Maven clotheslines Angle over the top and out but Christian goes for the Unprettier. Maven counters with the O'Connor Roll for 1...2...3 to win the match. Big upset win by Maven and the crowd loves it. Maven and Edge leave smiling with the heels irate in the ring. Nice to give Maven some shine as the "smiling babyface" trope still has some life....for now anyway. Serviceable match, nothing to complain about here.

Time of match: 4:28

Winners: Edge and Maven

We get more hype for Hulk Hogan "retiring" as we go to break. This week's Slam of The Week is Deacon Bautista and Reverend D'Von attacking Bubba Ray Dudley at Judgment Day. On to the next match.

Match 4

Reverend D'Von (with Deacon Bautista) vs Rikishi

D'Von has a new theme "He called my name" which was almost catchy at the time. Cole brings up Rikishi and Rico winning the tag belts on Sunday by complete accident as D'Von grabs a mic to begin. D'Von tells him to get the hell....heck in the back and put some clothes on. Love how the guy who used to say "Thou shall not fuck with the Dudley Boys" is now a preaching minister. Rikishi isn't amused and drops him with a right hand to start the bell. Rikishi hits a clothesline and D'Von goes for a sunset flip, but wisely rolls out of the way out of the ass drop. D'Von crawls to the corner and crosses himself (hahahaha) but here comes Rico down to ringside. Rikishi hits a belly to belly suplex and rams D'Von's head into the buckle. D'Von gets in a low blow and hits a flying clothesline. D'Von rallies with right hands in the corner but here comes Billy & Chuck out to the ring as well. Got enough heels out here or what? Already had Bautista in the corner but Billy, Chuck and Rico have joined us. D'Von drops an elbow on the apron and goes for a suplex. Tazz says that's a mistake as Rikishi naturally blocks it. Rikishi goes for a powerslam but Bautista grabs his foot. D'Von lands on top for 1....2...no. Rikishi rallies with right hands but D'Von hits a DDT to counter....that Rikishi no sells. Rikishi drops D'Von with a superkick as Tazz brings up Yokozuna was Rikishi's cousin. Rikishi later inan interview years later cried while saying Yokozuna paid off Rikishi's house when Rikishi was in financial trouble. Rikishi hits the the pop up cutter as Cole brings up Yokozuna vs Hulk Hogan. Got enough references? Bautista gets dropped off the apron by Rikishi and he avalanches D'Von in the corner. Rikishi calls for the Stinkface but Bautista distracts the ref long enough for Rico to nail Rikishi in the back of the head with his title belt. D'Von covers for 1...2..3 to win the match. Well that was stupid, D'Von's antics were chuckle worthy though.

Time of match: 3:11

Winner: D'Von by pinfall

D'Von and Bautista put the boots to Rikishi post-match with Billy & Chuck laughing at the entrance way. Bautista hits the spinebuster with almost no effort and leaves with D'Von. Rico then pretends to console Rikishi in the ring and gives the thumbs up to Billy & Chuck. Cole says Rikishi was never punished for giving Vince McMahon the stinkface last month and this could have been payback? What? Bautista has a future once this ridiculous church angle comes to and end, best believe that.

We cut to Chavo Guerrero Jr watching footage of Raw where Eddie Guerrero broke a beer bottle over Steve Austin's head. No wonder Austin wanted out so badly. Chavo is interrupted by ace reporter Gregory Helms and asks who's been leaving notes for The Hurricane. Chavo says he doesn't leave "stinkin" notes, he'll face Hurricane later tonight and take his title. Gregory opens a locker and finds a note "by the power of Greyskull". It says "I'm not tall and I'm not fat, but I left you a clue." Tazz "Beef jerky???" So logically someone is leaving notes in random lockers just hoping that Hurricane or Gregory Helms just happens to be there that night? This better lead to something good.

We cut to Dorkus Malorkus who's with Triple H. He says what he did was amazing and HHH says HIAC was the most brutal match ever devised. He says there's no winners in HIAC, just survivors. He says he's the survivor and Storm found out he's the game. His focus is not on Lance Storm or Chris Jericho, he wants to be WWE Champion again. Lance Storm walks up and says Hunter got lucky tonight, and his luck has run out. Test then big boots HHH out of nowhere as we go to break. Back from commercial we get hype for Velocity, sex sells...but who's buyin? We're shown Test blasting HHH with the announcers speculating why. Tazz says it was Test making up for kissing Stacy earlier. On to the next match.

Match 5

Chavo Guerrero Jr vs The Hurricane for the WWE Cruiserweight Championship

Tazz says he's got nothing to do with the notes as Hurricane makes his entrance. Bell's gone and Hurricane starts with an eye poke, ha! Hurricane drops Chavo with a shoulderblock and powerslam, covering for 1...2..no. Hurricane is sent into the corner and Chavo hits a back suplex. Tazz and Cole start babbling about Hulk Hogan movies and Wrestlemania 1, CLEARLY Vince is in their ears on that one. Chavo kicks Hurricane on the second rope and hits a dropkick as well. Chavo covers for 1...2...no. Cole continues to babble on about Hogan accomplishments as Chavo hits another dropkick. Chavo covers for 1....2..no. Now they're babbling about Hogan feuds from the 80's as Hurricane hits a flying clothesline. Hurricane rallies with right hands and hits a running neckbreaker. He covers for 1...2..no. Cole for the second time in the course of 3 minutes says Hogan will retire as Chavo hits Emerald Flowsion of all things, covering for 1...2..no. Hurricane calls for the chokeslam but Chav blocks it, sending him into the corner. Chavo's charge eats elbow and Hurricane hits the second rope Blockbuster. He covers for 1..2....3 to win the match. If you watched the match on mute, it would have been good. Otherwise that was painful.

Time of match: 2:56

Winner: Hurricane by pinfall (still Crusierweight Champion)

WWE cared so much about that last match we cut to Stacy and Vince McMahon himself as soon as the bell rang, didn't even wait for Hurricane to get his damn hand raised. Stacy says Test's kiss meant nothing and he was just fooling around in the ring. Vince says don't worry about it because Hulk Hogan's retirement means as much as the Gettysburg Address or President Bush's state of the union address. Great false equivalency but here comes Chris Jericho barging in to whine about facing Mark Henry. Jericho asks what Vince was thinking and Vince says this an opportunity for him to take a step forward in his legacy by beating the world's strongest man. Jericho "Can I beat the world's strongest man? What did he mean by calling me sweet britches?" Vince and Stacy are aghast as we go to break.

Back from break the "Slam of the Week" is referee Tim White getting thrown into the cell and Jericho hitting HHH with a chair during Hell in A Cell. Sadly that was the beginning of the end of Tim White's career as he suffered a massive separated shoulder injury for real. On to the next match.

Match 6

Mark Henry vs Chris Jericho

The kayfabe storyline is HHH looked like hot garbage against Lance Storm because of his injuries and Jericho won't be 100 percent in this one either. Bell's gone and Henry backs him into the ropes, only for Chris to kick him in the ribs. Jericho runs into a big boot and a big right hand. Mark yells at him to get up and Jericho crawls into the corner. Henry chops his chest and whips him to the opposite corner. Henry avalanches Jericho and punches him in the ribs. Henry heaves Jericho across the ring and Jericho is busted open just like HHH from earlier. Henry goes for the Vader Bomb but Jericho rolled out of the ring. Jericho dropkicks the knee of Henry but runs into a slam. Henry's charge in the corner eats boot but he catches Jericho in mid-air on a cross body attempt. He military presses Jericho and slams him down then sits on Jericho on the second rope. Outside the ring, Jericho sends him into the ring post and throws a chair in the ring. Henry sends Jericho in the ring post then slides inside. Henry grabs a chair of his own and brings it into the ring. Referee Mike Sparks grabs the chair and Jericho waffles Henry in the back with the chair he threw in earlier. Jericho covers for 1...2....3 to win the match. What was the point of that, that Jericho had to cheat to beat Mark Henry because he was too beat up? At least Lance Storm looked like he had no chance in hell to beat a healthy HHH because as a heel, that works. You could have had the exact same Henry/Jericho match with Jericho healthy and nothing would have changed. Oh well...the less said of it, the better.

Time of match: 3:17

Winner: Jericho by pinfall

A bloody Jericho walks off as Cole says to set your VCRs because Hogan is retiring when we come back from break. Back from break, its time. Hogan gets a huge pop during his entrance if you're watching the original broadcast. If you're watching the Network version, the horrible music overdub kills the crowd noise. Hogan says he loves the fans to start and says he was born Terry Bollea on August 11, 1953 in Augusta, Georgia. He was raised in Tampa, Florida and was the son of pipe layer Pete and housewife Ruth. His parents were working class people who worked their whole lives to provide for the family. Then 20 years ago he had the opportunity to get into the business....and this is where he's a little off because 20 years ago (1982) he was in the AWA. He's had a blast the last 20 years and had the time of his life, which starts a Hogan chant from the crowd. He says there's only one thing regrets and that his father isn't here since he passed away this past December. His father had his sixth stroke and only lit up when he saw Raw and Smackdown. One day his father got tired of it all, tore his trach tube out and told him "Terry, you need to go back to wrestling and straighten out your career" and "Terry, you need to go back to WWF (yes, Hulk said F). Hulk says here he is and he couldn't have done it without the fans. He thanks the fans and says there comes a time in every man's life when they have to step down. He brings up "You gotta know when to hold em, and know when to fold em." He says thanks for the memories and says he wants one last hope & dream, that Hulkamania will live forever. He thanks the fans as Voodoo Child hits on the original broadcast or the horrible Network song depending on what you're watching. 

He poses for the fans but No Chance hits. Vince McMahon hits the ring for a rebuttal and Tazz says they have a long history together. Vince mocks him saying "Say it ain't so." Vince sarcastically says the sky is falling and the world is coming to an end because Hogan is retiring. Vince then says its pathetic for Hulk to be retiring in "the rectum of" Tupelo, Mississippi of all places (which would be bizarre as hell if this was for real). Vince says "Hogan, read my lips. There's no chance in hell of you retiring." Vince says Hulk's not going to retire because 10 years ago he walked out on him, but not this time. He'll sue him and his family for everything they got if he breaches his signed contract. Vince says the only way Hulk leaves is when his body is decomposing in a pine box. Vince "I created Hulk Hogan" and he owns Hulkamania. (Neither are true) He says he owns Hogan until the day he dies. Hulk grabs Vince and says one day he may retire but it won't be until he kicks his ass. Hulk gets a massive pop for dropping Vince with a right hand. Hulk whips Vince with his weight lifting belt but here comes The Undertaker for the save. Taker pounds away in the corner and whips him into the other corner. Taker's charge eats elbow and Hulk drops him with an axehandle smash to the head. Hogan clotheslines Taker over the top to the floor as Cole says Hulkamania lives. Tazz whoops it up as Taker retreats with Vince, Hogan in the ring catering to the crowd. We sign off with Hogan standing tall.

So what the hell was the point of that? They spent the whole show hyping up Hogan's retirement to the point they ignored parts or the majority of whole matches only for Vince to say like hell you're retiring. I do like Hogan giving his true life story before going into the carny talk. If you honestly believe Pete Bollea near death ripped his trach tube out and told Hogan to go back to WWF, I got a bridge in Mongolia to sell you. Still, it put over the point that Hogan wanted to come back and have another run. I also like Vince bringing up Hogan leaving WWF in 1992 although I think he actually meant Hogan walking out in 1993 after holding the WWF title hostage until he dropped it to Yokozuna. So why the fake retirement? Unless we're getting Taker vs Hogan round 4 at King of The Ring, it was just a one night storyline to put over Vince and Hogan have kayfabe heat. Whoop de do, you didn't have to hype it up all night, you could have had Hogan do it with no warning. The rest of the show was just window dressing and hopefully this doesn't become a theme moving forward. Still, the first shows after a ppv are usually cucka so maybe next week will be better. The next show after this Friday night's Raw house show in Duluth, Minnesota. I'll see you there.

WWE Judgement Day 2002 (5/19/02)

This was the first ppv officially licensed under the name WWE so this is where the "modern era" begins. The main event for this ppv would be the rubber match between The Undertaker and Hulk Hogan for the WWE Championship. Taker won at Survivor Series 91 but Hogan took the rematch a week later on Tuesday in Texas (the first attempt of what would later be Taboo Tuesday/Cyber Sunday) so 11 years later they finally settle the score. Other matches include Steve Austin vs Ric Flair and Big Show, which had been brewing for a month and HHH vs Chris Jericho in a Hell in the Cell. Also included are a hair vs hair match between Kurt Angle and Edge and the rubber match between Eddie Guerrero and Rob Van Dam. The undercard looked great at least on paper while the main event should be at least watchable.

MAY 19, 2002

GAYLORD ENTERTAINMENT CENTER

NASHVILLE, TN

Commentators: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

Match 1

Rob Van Dam vs Eddie Guerrero for the WWE Intercontinental Championship

 This was the 3rd match between the 2 in a month, Guerrero took the title from Van Dam at Backlash and Van Dam won by DQ at Insurrextion. Hope this match is as good as the other two. Guerrero swings and misses and Van Dam hits a shoulder tackle. Rob goes for 3 quick covers before Guerrero goes outside and throws a temper tantrum. Back inside Eddie gains the advantage with some heel tactics but a charge in the corner eats boot. Van Dam fakes Eddie out and hits a split legged moonsault and a high backbody drop. Eddie runs into a tilt a whirl but the cover gets a deuce. Rob stomps away as Eddie says "nonononono" Rob locks in a butterfly lock and damn near pinned him with it. That must have hurt like hell......Rob hits a standing moonsault and then Eddie backs into the corner and calls timeout. King says "No Mas, No Mas" before Eddie fires back and stomps a mud-hole in Van Dam. Eddie gives Rob an indian sunburn on the ring apron before taunting the crowd. JR shills the Guerrero family as Eddie sticks a thumb to the eye, then JR mentions we're in Lawler country. Rob hits a split/monkey flip spot before a slugfest ensues, which Guerrero wins. Van Dam then hits another monkey flip before hot-shotting him throat first on the top rope. A rolling thunder gets 2 as a sign in the crowd says "R.I.P. Davey Boy". The king of Coliseum Video wins, British Bulldog sadly died shortly before this ppv. Guerrero counters a suplex into a prawn for a 2 but Van Dam fires back with a step-over heel kick. Rob goes upstairs but Eddie crotches him then powerbombs him almost through the mat. Eddie goes upstairs and says "I feel froggy" but missed the splash. They trade blows before Rob Van Dam turns into Jean Claude Van Dam and hits a roundhouse kick to make the crowd go "woah". Rob goes upstairs but missed the 5-star attempt. King "How do you say RVD in Spanish?" JR "I don't have a damn clue" They just stand there looking at each other before going into a leapfrogging session which ends with a flying bodypress by Van Dam for a long two count. Rob counters a european uppercut into a backslide for another long deuce before Eddie counters a roundhouse kick into a backslide, then puts his feet on the ropes for 1...2....3., nice. JR cries foul but Eddie retains the title in a decent opener. The roundhouse Rob hit earlier was one of the sickest spots I've seen in a while. I thought it was going to be good and it was. Show's off to a good start.

Time of match:  11:08

Winner: Eddie Guerrero by pinfall (still IC champion)

   The next segment is Reverand D'Von, Stacy Keibler, Deacon Bautista and Vince McMahon all bowing in a prayer......now before I try to explain what the hell I'm watching, here's some backstory. Someone had the bright idea (sarcasm) to split the Dudley Boys and while Bubba Ray was basically the same as he always was on Raw, they turned D'Von into a preaching minister. DVon was also given a bodyguard, a 6'6 300 lb monster named Leviathan (great Peter Weller movie btw) in Ohio Valley Wrestling became Deacon Bautista on Smackdown. Stacy, Deacon and D'Von close their eyes while Vince takes that opportunity to check out Stacy as D'Von preaches that Stacy will take out Trish in their match and if Bubba Ray interferes he'll be taken out as well. Oh and if you couldn't guess, donation box carrying Deacon Bautista is now known as "The Animal" Dave Batista, a legend that needs no introduction. Then we cut to a "Get the F Out" commercial......its bad enough we had to see these horrible attempt to look hip commercials on weekly television, but on a ppv? The backstory to those that don't know was the World Wildlife Foundation successfully sued World Wrestling Federation for the rights to the initials WWF so Vince renamed his company World Wrestling Entertainment and tried to look cool by having commercials say "Get the F out". It wasn't cool...it was openly admitting he lost. Should have just slipped the Wildlifers a few bucks to go away.

Match 2

Stacy Keibler (with D'Von Dudley and Deacon Bautista) vs Trish Stratus (with Bubba Ray Dudley) for the WWE Women's Championship

 An inter-promotional diva-fest that could actually be interesting. The re-union of the Dudleys combined with the looks of Stacy and the debut of Bautista could be noteworthy here. Stacy held a swimsuit contest on Smackdown and Tajiri pulled Torrie Wilson out of the competition leaving Trish to enter and win, then giving Stacy a beat-down. Trish enters alone wearing a purple leotard (what?) and then Stacy enters with Deacon and D'Von in tow. Bubba is announced last which is interesting since he's neither the champion nor the challenger or even in the match period. Trish starts out with forearms before catching a roundhouse kick from Stacy. That one may have trumped Van Dam's from earlier but the cover gets 2. Stacy hits a sloppy looking back-drop before making another cover. Trish hits some clothesline and puts Stacy in a boston crab. Stacy counters into a sunset flip (impressive by her standards) but Trish hits a neckbreaker for another 2 count. Trish hits the Chick Kick that knocks Stacy out of the ring into Bubba Ray territory. Bubba leans over her and then laughs in her face, causing Stacy to slap him across the face. Hahahhahahaha! Bubba backs Stacy into the corner of the ring as the ref tells Bubba to get lost....but then Deacon Bautista gets in the ring and slams Trish. Stacy slides in but the cover only gets 2. Stacy locks in a chin lock before pulling her hair, then Trish hits a jump kick before hitting a baseball slide on Bautista. Deacon is unfazed so he hops up on the apron but is nailed by a Stacy Keibler clothesline that was aimed for Trish. Again Deacon is unfazed as Trish hits a one handed bulldog and covers for 3 to win the match. D'Von gets in the ring and chases Trish away but then Bubba gets in and the crowd pops loudly. D'Von then tries to offer a handshake and Bubba accepts, then takes out an on-rushing Bautista, then D'Von hits a running clothesline. D'Von then repents and shakes his head as Deacon gets in and stomps a mudhole in Bubba. D'Von then restrains Deacon before giving the old sign of the cross...and resumes the beatdown. D'Von tells Bautista to get the tables as D'Von begins preaching to Bubba that he needs to be taught a lesson. Wonder what Spike Dudley was doing at this time. Deacon then goes for what's now known as the Batista Bomb through a table but Bubba counters and attacks D'Von in the corner. Batista...errr Bautista hits Bubba with the donation box and they flapjack Bubba through a table. In what has to be the gayest (and I don't mean homosexual gay) moment of Bautista's career, before the Eddie Guerrero hug, he then holds his hands together and looks up to pray. Stacy wakes up and they all celebrate in the ring. Damn did Stacy suck in that match....you'd think with three years in the business she'd have learned a thing or two by now. Hell she started in 1999 and Trish in 2000 and still looks years behind Trish in terms of ability. Ah well, least she didn't have a miscarriage in this promotion. Also she was much more comfortable as a manager, and a damn good one, so why didn't they have Bubba vs D-Von with Trish and Stacy outside?

Time of Match:  2:55

Winner: Trish Stratus by pinfall (Still Women's champion)

  The next segment is Ric Flair and Arn Anderson getting confronted by Vince himself and they shake hands because Flair is sick of Austin as well. Flair says unlike Vince he'll take Steve down. Vince and Flair hug as McMahon looks angered by that comment.

Match 3

The Hardy Boyz vs Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman

 No Shawn Stasiak this time...Heyman will do it himself. The storyline going into this one is Brock has been a one man wrecking crew and is on the verge of breaking out as a superstar once he's done with Matt and Jeff Hardy. He's been feuding with them for a solid month now. Speaking of Jeff....he flies out of the ring as Lesnar makes his entrance and Brock catches him. Matt quickly baseball slides into Jeff to knock Brock flat on his back. The Hardys double team Brock outside the ring then chase Heyman inside. Heyman begs for mercy before Lesnar clobbers The Hardys with a double clothesline as the bell rings, Lesnar gets rid of Matt then feasts in Jeff in the corner with shoulder blocks. Jeff tries to counter but Lesnar's power is too much. Matt tags in and goes on the offensive but Lesnar takes control and hits more shoulderblocks in the corner as the crowd starts up a GOLDBERGGGG chant. Wait two years, people. Matt blocks a overhead press but is caught in a powerslam. Everything Lesnar has done so far is high impact power moves, and keep in mind he was a mat based wrestler in high school and college. Lesnar continues to hit shoulderblocks in the corner before Matt counters with a tornado ddt. Jeff tags in and hits whisper in the wind and then a jawbreaker. Jeff trips up Brock as Matt goes upstairs and they hit their 2Xtreme legdrop combo....ok I made the name up but you can visualize it can't you? Brock is barely fazed but is hit by the Leap of Faith by Jeff and clotheslined out of the ring by Matt. The Hardys chase Heyman around the ring again and finally Matt grabs ahold inside the ring. Paul's hat falls off exposing his bald head as King squeals "LOOK AT HIS HEADD...HAHAA LOOK AT HIS HEAD" Matt unloads on Paul in the corner and Jeff hits a Leap of Faith. Brock comes over and pulls Matt out under the ring as Jeff goes upstairs. Brock gets in and catches Jeff in mid-air....then falls backwards for a two count. Who blew that spot? Jeff charges and Brock leapfrogs him over his head and crashing into Matt on the apron, knocking him off. Brock hits the F-5 and tags in Heyman, who trips getting in the ring as JR scoffs. A cover gets the 1--2--3 to win the match and, oh yes, Paul Heyman has pinned Jeff Hardy.  After the match Heyman takes his jacket off as King prays he doesn't continue to strip. Brock did all the work of course and looming on the horizon....King of the Ring. Lesnar had proven his point by taking out both Hardys, now it was on to better things.

Time of match: 4:47

Winners: Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman by pinfall

  The next segment is some dorkus malorkus interviewing Booker T about his recent joining of the nWo on Raw. Before I continue I should point out after Scott Hall was fired, they replaced him with Booker T. The move wasn't so bad in terms of a talent standpoint since Scott really couldn't work anymore and Booker was amongst the best, it was that to ANYONE that followed WCW knew that Booker was anti-nWo since the beginning. Anyway Booker says that he's the man before spotting a Halle Berry lookalike contest winner and proceeds to hit on her until she tells him she wants him to sign her an autograph in a very special place and proceeds to give him the key to her hotel. Booker then goes crazy as we head for our next match but not before King says "I think Booker just got a magic johnson!"

Match 4

Steve Austin vs Ric Flair and Big Show

   This one has been brewing for months. It started at Backlash when Flair unknowingly screwed Austin out of the WWE title and then began to make one mistake after another before Austin stunned him at Insurrexion (as well as several other times on Raw). Big Show highlights are shown including a promo he cut saying how when Austin was out from 99-00, Show was one of the main stars but when Austin came back he (meaning Show) was turned into a joke. Yes, a rare logical storyline since Big Show was pretty much an afterthought to this point in May 2002. This was pretty much a pseudo-heel turn by Flair who hated Austin but after this was over, would go back to being his jolly old self. Big Show comes out to his new nWo theme as Flair comes out to his old school WWF theme.....until the theme ends and you can hear his 2001 Space Odyssey tune finishing out and they actually overlap at the end. Which means they were overdubbing the old school all along, guess they didn't want to pay royalties or something. Austin enters and begins slugging away at the both of them. Austin backdrops Flair and kicks away at Big Show, he then goes for a stunner attempt but is thrown into Flair. Austin slugs away at Big Show and fires away at Flair before hitting a low blow on Show. Austin applies a figure four and in a dumb spot, hits Flair while lying on his back and Flair sells it like he was hit by a truck. Austin flips off Flair and applies a figure four on flair then rolls out of the way of an oncoming Big Show elbow drop. Austin rolls outside and grabs a chair and gets inside which provokes referee and Flair lackey Charles Robinson to give him an earful. Finally Austin gives up the chair....then rolls out and gets another one. He then props the chair and sits in it, then flips off Charles Robinson. I'm gonna miss Austin that's for sure....I'll explain what I mean at the end of this match. Flair climbs to the second rope and stands behind Show. The crowd gets a "What" chant going as Austin locks up with Flair.....and I just realize this is the first time they've wrestled in any sort of meaningful match since 1993 back when Austin was chumming with the late Brian Pillman. What a shame how this could have been a money-making main event back in 1998 but is a midcard match on a 2002 ppv. Austin slugs Big Show and says "what?" but hits Flair with a shoulderblock. Flair rolls outside and regroups with Big Show as Austin rolls outside and grabs a brewsky Its a little early for the post-match celebration. Austin teases cracking it open before discarding it and eats a Flair shoulderblock. Flair begs off and then catches Steve with a thumb to the eye. Flair chops the rattlesnake in the corner as the crowd chants WOOOOOO. Austin then counters and begins chops of his own as the crowd loudly chants "What?" Flair does a flop and again begs for mercy. Austin hits a series of punches then no sells an inverted atomic drop before clotheslining Flair down. Flair tags out to Show as King says "Now the fun begins". Show taunts Austin before Austin does push-ups to piss Show off, which Show answers with open handed chops to the chest. Austin regains his composure and once again is sent down from a big chop. Austin then counters with punches but eats a big boot to kill the momentum. Flair tags in and hits a lowblow on Steve as JR scoffs. Flair struts as Big Show laughs as Ric chops Austin in the corner, then they trade blows. Flair gets another thumb to the eye and goes upstairs, but Austin throws him off the top rope. Steve stomps a mudhole in Flair and then attacks an interfering Big Show, but Show counters with a powerslam. A cover gets 2 and Flair continues to stomp away on Steve before taunting the crowd. Flair chops and punches Austin in the corner again and begins attacking the left leg of Austin. Show tags in and begins wearing down the leg Flair was working on. Flair tags back in and Austin surprises him with an inside cradle for a 2 count. Flair then hits the figure four leg lock....and the crowd doesn't even pop or cheer. After a minute Austin reverses the hold but Show comes in and drops an elbow. Austin sneaks a backslide for a 2 count but Flair hits more chops and a right hand. Austin rallies with chops as the crowd chants "Woo" and "What". Austin then hits a spinebuster and another figure four before Show comes in and leg drops Steve. Flair tags in Big Show who eats boot twice before Austin hits a Lou Thez press from the second rope. Flair comes in and is met with a conventional Thez press. Austin hits a low blow and a spine buster, but Show stops the counter attempt. Austin counters a chokeslam attempt into a Stunner but nWo member X-Pac interferes. Austin ducks under a savate kick and Pac nails Show with it instead and is stunned for his effort by Steve. Austin stuns Flair and covers for the 1-2--3 to win the match even though Big Show was the legal man. Austin then does his double drink salute on the ramp. Not the best match but the crowd was really into it with all the chants.

I should point out following this ppv, Austin grew increasingly bitter against Stephanie McMahon and the other writers so on June 2, 2002...he walked out. That's right, the man who helped launch the WWF into the stratusphere in 1998 got so angry he took his ball and went home. One of the reasons was that they wanted him to job cleanly to Brock Lesnar in a King of the Ring qualifying match on an upcoming Raw. Austin said he had no problem jobbing to Lesnar, but would rather do it in a more important match such as a ppv main event or something (Think of Austin, the 1996 KOTR passing the torch to Lesnar in the 2002 final). On one hand Austin was definitely playing an ego card by refusing to job to Lesnar and getting angry that they were putting others in the spotlight ahead of him, but when you saw what they were doing to the careers of Chris Jericho, The Hardys and Austin himself you could feel for him. Stephanie was the head writer and HHH was her fiancee....who do you think's getting the spotlight? So as it was, this would be the last ppv Austin would wrestle at for 8 months...least he went out with a win.

Time of match: 15:36

Winner: Steve Austin by pinfall

 The next segment is hosted by Michael Cole and Tazz which highlights the upcoming hair vs hair match. They show a preview of what both would look like bald, and Edge with the shades looked like Ron Pearlman from Blade 2. I should point out that one of the oldest rules in promoting is give the fans a match they want to see, but do it in a manner where the outcome of the match can't be given away, therefor making fans pay to see what happens. A perfect example of how to do it and how not to do it happened at Wrestlemania 18, two months earlier. The Rock faced Hulk Hogan in a match fans paid to see but the buildup and the combined ego's of the two men involved gave no indication of who would win, therefor fans were interested enough to pay to see the outcome. The opposite of this would be HHH vs Jericho, HHH was being booked as an unstoppable face after returning from quad surgery and Jericho was being booked so horribly that everyone knew HHH was going to win, also because HHH is an ego-maniac and Jericho has never been known to have a backstage ego (which is ironic given his on-screen character). Edge has long blond hair that the female fans love and Kurt has a noticeable receding hairline so it doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to figure out who wins this one. I just hope the match itself is worth the inevitable conclusion.

Match 5

Edge vs Kurt Angle  (Hair vs Hair)

 Remember in my Backlash review how I said even through the storylines for this feud were silly but the matches delivered, this would be the epitome. A hair vs hair match usually stinks the joint out but if its booked properly, can be a noteworthy event (Wrestlemania 23). This could have been the opposite, fans were hot to see Edge and Angle get it on but certainly not in a manner like this. They lock up and Angle hooks in a cement mixer that Edge quickly backs into the corner to avoid the pinfall attempt. Kurt locks in a front facelock and they chain sequence until Edge hits a running roll-up for a 2 count. Angle goes on offense as JR shills Kurt's career at this point. Edge throws Kurt over and out then hits a baseball slide, then goes on offense outside. Kurt gets the upper hand back inside with punches and kicks before eating a back body drop. Edge ties Kurt into the top rope Andre the Giant style and then hits a spear. A second attempt is turned into a belly-to-belly suplex from the ring to the floor by Angle onto Edge. Kurt stomps away in the corner but turns his attention to the ref long enough to start an "Angle sucks" chant. Edge chops Kurt but eats a spinebuster for his troubles. Angle chokes Edge with his knee on the second rope as King tries to make fun of Edge by saying he has a dinosaur shaped head and then says JR has a bowling ball shaped head. Edge hits a back elbow smash but Kurt counters with a ddt/pinfall attempt for a 2 count. Kurt locks in a resthold as JR puts over the importance of this match, King says the loser of this match should seek help from Howard Finkel. As Edge does the fade-then-revive routine, King accidentally says "WWF" and JR scolds him on it, this was literally the first month of the name change and after saying the letters WWF for over 20 years, kind of hard to adjust in a matter of weeks. Edge powers out and Kurt takes him down by the hair then hits a floatover suplex for a 2 count. Kurt goes for a double armbar facelock as JR says if Edge loses his hair all the ladies will weep, then King says "I was hoping you wouldn't say if Edge loses all the kids will shave their heads" Nevermind the fact the kids shave their heads anyway due to a Mister Stone Cold Steve Austin. Edge hits a BtB suplex of his own and they stay down for a few seconds. Edge rallies with clotheslines and a spinning back kick, then an Edge-o-matic for 2. Kurt hits another BtB suplex as King hypes up the next match (Hell in a Cell). Edge backdrops Kurt onto the apron but kicks his legs out from under him. Edge hits a plancha from the ring to the floor onto Angle...but doesn't clear the ropes completely like he did at Summerslam 98. Edge goes upstairs and shoves an onrushing Angle off the turnbuckle then hits a missle dropkick. A cover gets a LONG 2 count and Angle quickly recovers to hit a german suplex. King and JR are non-stop with hair jokes as Edge turns another german into a victory roll for a 2 count. Edge hits the Edgecution and then goes upstairs again but this time Angle gets the overhead suplex from the top. Kurt covers for the 1..2...noooooo Edge kicks out at 2. Edge hits a superkick and hits a ddt from the second rope but the near-fall is a 2. Edge goes for the spear but Angle moves and referee Brian Hebner goes flying. Kurt does another german and Edge actually does a 360, landing on his face as the crowd all goes silent at once. Kurt covers but Hebner's out, so he goes out and grabs a chair. Edge counters a swing with a spear but the ref is still down. Edge calls for another spear but Angle kicks him in the face. Kurt goes for the angle-slam but Edge hits another spear but Hebner takes too long and Angle kicks out at 2. Edge blocks an angle-slam but Angle hits a spear of his own and finally hits an angle-slam. The cover gets 1...2...NOOOOO Edge kicks out as Angle is heated. Angle unstraps his singlet and locks in an ankle-lock, but Edge counters with an enziguiri. Angle hits a single-leg takedown and hits another anklelock but Edge kicks angle off the ropes and catches Kurt with an inside cradle for 1...2..3 AND ITS OVER. Angle attacks Edge after the bell but Edge counters with the Edgecution. Edge drags Kurt to the barber area set up where Kurt manages to escape.....lame. Decent match but Angle managed to escape for now with his hair

Time of match: 15:30

Winner: Edge by pinfall (Kurt is to be shaved bald)

 The next camera shot is the Marriott Hotel across the street and King says "Uhhhhh...what would be the reason to show that?" Then we see Booker T in bed calling for his new "friend" to get in bed. Then she says to turn off the light and he complies, then she says to kiss her but the camera light unfortunately shows someone leaving the bed and someone else getting in. Booker then says "what do u want me to do now" and Goldust's voice says "I want you to leave the nWo!" Booker turns on the light and screams then runs out with his ass showing as Goldust turns to the woman and says "...I wore this dress for nothing!" On to the next match before I throw up.

Match 6

HHH vs Chris Jericho (Hell in a Cell)

 This would be the end of one of the dumbest and frustrating storylines I've ever been forced to witness. Chris Jericho after years of service with both WCW and WWE finally got his due when he pinned both The Rock and Steve Austin in the same night at Vengeance 2001 to become WWE Champion. Now as the champion, he then took a back-seat to the returning HHH and began serving as Stephanie McMahon's lackey. After HHH beat Jericho for the title at Wrestlemania, Jericho wasn't even booked to wrestle at Backlash while HHH jobbed to Hulk Hogan. In the storylines, Vince McMahon was mad at HHH for the pedigree on both Vince and Stephanie so he employed Jericho to take him out in a Hell in a Cell. Yes, so not only was Jericho never given his rematch for the title, he was now forced to be the McMahon's hired gun against HHH. They do a stare down to start the match then trade blows. Hunter hits a high knee and a backdrop then goes on offense in the corner. HHH throws out Jericho and both counter each others attempt to ram heads into steel. Back inside Jericho flys and hits HHH but a slugfest ensues. Chris says "Come on you sonovabitch" but misses a shoulderblock and hits the ringpost. HHH finally rams Jericho head first into the cell outside and then body first on the other side. Back inside HHH continues the assault with short armed clotheslines and a suplex. Jericho whips HHH over the corner to the floor and finally Chris gets some offense in. HHH reverses a whip and Jericho goes into the steel steps as his arm cuts open. HHH goes for a piledriver on the steps but Jericho counters and catapaults HHH into the cell. Jericho goes and gets...a ladder from under the ring. Jericho rams the ladder into HHH who blades, then Jericho grates Hunter's head into the cell. Back inside Jericho javelins the ladder into HHH's head again, before proping the ladder in the corner. Jericho whips HHH into the ladder who bounces off, over the top rope and face first onto the steel steps. King says "Looks like he's in a pinball machine" and Jericho throws the ladder out onto HHH. Jericho whips HHH into the cell and puts the ladder and a chair in the ring. Jericho goes for the ladder but HHH counters with a chair shot on the ladder. HHH hits Chris in the back with the chair but Y2J hits the one-arm facebuster on the ladder. Chris gets the steel steps as referee Tim White says "Get in the god damn ring Jericho, I've had enough." Jericho picks up the steps but HHH drop-toes him into it. HHH hits a neckbreaker and a facebuster then heaves the steps right into the bad shoulder of Jericho. Outside HHH javelins Jericho into the cell and heaves him into the other set of steel steps. Tim White heads out onto the apron to fix something as both HHH and Jericho head back inside. Jericho charges but HHH throws him into Tim White who ricochets right into the cell. Jericho hits HHH with a chairshots as JR speculates that Tim had the key to the door. Jericho covers but White's nowhere to be found, so Y2J goes outside and tosses White into the other side of the cell because he's such a role model. White is busted open and Jericho pummels him for absolutely no reason. Jericho runs inside right into a spinebuster by The Game. By this point referees Mike Chioda and Jim Korderas get a pair of clippers and cuts the lock off the cell. The officials check on White as HHH kicks the chair into Jericho's face. HHH goes outside and gets his equalizer the sledgehammer. HHH nails Jericho with it but with the referee's busy, there's no one to count the fall. Jericho slips outside and crawls out of the now open door, then shuts it in Triple H's face. HHH finally crawls out and is met with boots by Y2J. They battle all around the outside of the cell and onto King and JR's announce table. Jericho dismantles the Spanish announce table and goes for a pedrigree but HHH blocks it and ddt's Chris through the table. Jericho makes his way up to the top of the cell as HHH unveils a 2 X 4 wrapped in barbed wire. I remember a friend of mine saying "I can understand ladders, tables, chairs and sledgehammers under the ring, but what the hell does THAT have to do with ring maintenence? The 2 X 4 has a wrap on it so HHH straps it on his wrist and climbs to the top as well. Both are now on top of the cell but Jericho uses the 2 X 4 first to the back of HHH. JR reflects on past cell matches as Jericho locks in the Walls of Jericho but Chioda just then starts climbing to the top. Once Chioda gets up there, HHH crawls and kicks Chris off. Y2J gets the 2 X 4 but HHH hits a low blow, but Jericho back-drops HHH into the cell, which doesn't give away. If the thing did give way he would have landed on the top rope in the ring, now that would have been cool. HHH picks up the 2 X 4 and waffles Chris with it, and it catches in his hair. Hunter covers but Jericho kicks out, now Jericho is clearly busted open in the face. HHH hits the pedigree and covers for the 1...2...3 to end this massacre. HHH poses on the top of the cell as JR shills both of them. This would be Tim White's last match ever as an official and this would later lead to a horrific angle which I'll get to in due process, but for now The Game has won.

Time of Match: 24:31

Winner: HHH by pinfall

  We then cut to Kurt Angle running away from Edge, who disguises himself in the makeup chair as Edge runs by. Angle thinks he's fooled him but Edge quickly runs the other way after him. We then cut to another Get the F out commericial with SEXUAL CHOCOLATE as the theme song. After this we head on over to The World in Times Square where Maven is on a date with Torrie Wilson. Torrie says how wearing the geisha outfit was cool, but she'd rather wear nothing at all which causes Maven to do a spittake. Back at ringside JR and King go back to work and put over the previous match before the next match begins.

Match 7

Rikishi and Rico vs Billy and Chuck for the WWE Tag Team Championships

 Before the match is started, it is learned that Rikishi will challenge Billy and Chuck with a Mr. McMahon appointed partner. Howard Finkel then says by order of Vince McMahon..RICO is named the partner. Yes, the manager of the tag team champions, and JR scoffs. Rico is making his ppv in ring debut here and I should note he wasn't a bad worker in his OVW days but the gimmick is really dumb. Billy starts out with Rikishi and unloads with fists but Kish rallies. Billy hits a ddt that doesn't faze him at all so Kishi hits a superkick, Chuck interferes and Rikishi flattens him as well. Rikishi charges but Gunn and Palumbo move out of the way then hit a flapjack on Rikishi. Rikishi avoids and Billy dropkick and goes for the tag but Rico turns away. Billy tags in Chuck and hits football shoulderblocks in the corner and unloads with rights. Chuck hits a powerful overhead suplex and covers but kicks out at 2.  Billy tags in and hits the fame-asser and covers for 1---2---noooo, he kicks out. Chuck tags in and nails a Razor Ramon style right hand as referee Teddy Long scoffs. Rikishi counters a backdrop with a kick and hits a BtB suplex on Chuck. Rikishi tries to fight back and hits backdrop on Chuck and a samoan drop on an interfering Billy. Chuck goes for a sunset flip but Rikishi sits on him for 1....2...nooo Billy tackles him at the last second. Rikishi goes for a press-slam diamond cutter but botches it. Chuck hits a dropkick and orders Rico to kick him, but Rikishi ducks and Rico nails Chuck instead. Rikishi superkicks his own partner and covers Chuck for the 1...2...3?? Yes...Rikishi and Rico are the new tag team champions and no one pops, the crowd is dead silent. Rico wins his first gold inadvertently. Rikishi then does a victory dance complete with dance number at the entrance-way. Really really bad match but it did the job as the crowd is now relaxed enough for the main event

Time of Match: 3:50

Winners: Rikishi and Rico by pinfall (new WWE Tag Team Champions)

  Edge is still running after Angle and this time Kurt catches him with a trash can lid to the face. They brawl back to the ring and Kurt grabs the mic and proclaims he's gonna cut Edge's hair. They brawl near Floyd the barber and Edge locks in a sleeper hold. After a while Kurt is out and Edge finally gets to shave Angle bald. JR "Look at that, look at this"  King "I can't see anything" JR (pointing to the monitor) "Look over here" The crowd starts chanting NA NA NA NA, Goodbye as Edge finishes the job. Edge puts shaving cream on his hand and wakes Kurt up to show him the mirror. Edge grabs the mic and says "They're not gonna chant You suck anymore, but now they're gonna say You're Bald" Kurt's music starts up and the crowd does indeed chant You're Bald.  Kurt runs to the back and to this day he has never wrestled with hair again. On to the main event. 

Match 8

The Undertaker vs Hulk Hogan for the WWE Championship

The Hogan nostalgia run had catapulted Hogan to the WWE Championship but standing in his way is one of the only men to ever beat him clean, The Undertaker. The storyline was logical as Taker had beaten Austin at Backlash to become number 1 contender and then proceeds to beat up Hogan with a belt, to which Hogan counters by driving an 18 wheeler over Taker's bike. Taker enters to his You're Gonna Pay theme without the actual lyrics as Hogan comes out to Voodoo Child. JR brings up Taker's win over Hogan at Survivor Series 91 and Hogan's rematch victory at Tuesday in Texas, then Taker attacks Hogan with his own belt. Taker whips Hogan but Hogan comes back with right hands. Still wearing his entrance gear and belt, Hogan picks up the belt Taker brought and waffles Taker with it a bunch of times. The bell finally rings as Hogan rakes the eyes and punches Taker in the corner and hits a slow clothesline as JR basically admits this will not be your standard wrestling match. Hogan still has all his gear on and backdrops Taker and clotheslines him to the floor. Hogan tears the shirt off as the crowd cheers for some reason. Hogan and Taker battles outside before Hogan whips Taker into the steel steps. Hogan whips Taker into the foam guardrail before going back inside. Taker fires back with elbows and shoulder breakers as the crowd chants Hogan again. Taker goes for old school but Hogan blocks it and crotches Undertaker on the top turnbuckle. Hogan then does a superplex and covers for a near fall. Taker ducks under a clothesline and chop-blocks Hogan down and works over the left leg. Taker rams Hogan's leg into the side of the ring and then the ringpost, then adds a right cross for good measure. JR then says since Hogan is not a mat wrestler, taking out one of his legs makes him virtually defenseless....how come no one did that in the 80's? Taker does a leg-lock spot before Hogan counters by stomping his right leg about 9 times. They trade blows in the middle of the ring before Hogan hits a double axe-handle smash. Hogan then hits the big boot but Taker catches the right leg on the legdrop of doom attempt and turns into a half boston crab. JR says Hogan has never submitted before in his career.....which is blatently false because Starcade 97 was one of the biggest ppv's in wrestling history and Sting made him submit to the scorpion death lock. Hogan makes it to the rope and pulls himself up, but Taker slugs away in the corner. Taker goes for a big boot but Hogan pulls the top rope down and Taker crotches himself. Hogan pseudo Hulks Up and Taker hits one of the worst chokeslams I've ever seen, not even a foot off the ground. Taker covers and Hogan Hulks Up for real this time. Hogan hits the fists and big boot then the leg drop and covers for the 1..2...NOOOOOO. Hogan goes for another big boot and Taker counters with a ddt. Taker goes outside and gets a chair as Vince McMahon hits ring side. Hogan kicks the chair in Taker's face and hits the leg drop, but Vince gets on the apron and distracts referee Earl Hebner. Hogan brings Vince in the ring and drops the big leg on him. Earl rolls Vince out as Taker catches Hogan with a chair shot and a chokeslam. Taker covers for 1...2....3 to win the match and the title. Vince grins and the crowd goes silent. The Undertaker is your new WWE Champion.....the third new champion in 3 months which isn't a good thing. JR asks if Hulkamania is dead as Taker goes outside and gets a steel chair and drives Hogan throat first into it. Taker continues to attack Hogan with the chair as JR signs off and thus ends the ppv. Bad match but the belt has come off Hogan and onto The Undertaker for the 4th time in his career.

Time of Match:  11:17

Winner: The Undertaker by pinfall (new WWE Champion)

   This ppv was half and half. The opener was good, the hell in the cell was ok and the hair vs hair match was good, the rest were nowhere close to good. The biggest mistake was playing hot potato with the WWE Title since there's been a new champion crowned every month since Wrestlemania. Devaluing the world title is what helped kill WCW so doing this to their own was one of the reasons ratings began to decline. Although this was indeed a landmark event, Kurt Angle hasn't had hair nor has Hogan won a World title since, plus the whole Tim White saga and Rico's first title win. 2 1/2 stars out of 5...mainly due to the opening contest. The next ppv would be King of the Ring

WWF Insurrextion 2002 (5/4/02)

Insurrextion 2002 would take place deep in the heart of England. I should point out this would be the very last ppv under the name WWF as they changed to WWE 2 days later. The event was pretty much a rehash of the Backlash storylines while hyping up the upcoming Judgement Day ppv. I should point out that real life events were more important than what went on in the ring. On the plane back to the US, Scott Hall, Goldust and Ric Flair apparently sexually harrassed a flight attendant while Mr. Perfect and Brock Lesnar got into a fight. Hall and Perfect were both fired while Flair and Goldust continued to be jobbed out on television. Lesnar received no punishment for it was perceived that Perfect instigated it and continued his push. The main event was to feature the match that wasn't, The Undertaker vs HHH. Taker tried to cost HHH the WWF championship at Backlash so he wants his revenge. This is an exclusive Raw ppv so Jericho, Hogan and other Smackdown stars will not be attendance.

INSURREXTION

MAY 4, 2002

WEMBLEY ARENA

LONDON, ENGLAND

Commentators: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

Match 1

Rob Van Dam vs Eddie Guerrero for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

 The rematch from Backlash is shown here in England as Van Dam wants the title that Guerrero basically stole from him. I didn't think it was such a great idea to play hot potato with the IC title since Edge was the champion three months earlier before losing it to Regal, who lost it to Van Dam at Wrestlemania, who lost it to Guerrero at Backlash.  As the match starts....I hear the sound of doom. That damn horn that haunted me during the World Tour tapes from way back is loud and clear....I HATED that and now I have to deal with it again. JR and King is on commentary so I can't mute it either, guess I'll just have to deal with it. They exchange holds before Van Dam botches a sweep attempt but they still get an ovation after. They yell at each other before Guerrero starts taking over but Van Dam counters with a spinning wheel kick. Guerrero rolls to the outside and Van Dam catches him with a baseball slide. Van Dam hits a second rope asai moonsault. RVD throws Eddie back inside and hits a springboard leg drop, followed by a split-legged moonsault. A few near falls later, Guerrero counters a charge into a sunset flip. After a sequence Van Dam does a split and monkey flips Eddie across the ring. Eddie ducks a charge and Van Dam flies through the ropes to the outside. Eddie goes to work outside and then back inside as Ross mentions this event sold out 6 months earlier in a matter of hours. Guerrero takes over on offense and stomps a mudhole in Rob. Later on Guerrero hits a float over suplex that merits a 2 count. They exchange blows in the ring until Eddie hits a back suplex. Eddie goes to the apron and hits a beautiful sommersault on Van Dam but the cover gets a deuce. Eddie locks in a rest hold as the crowd chants RVD. Van Dam makes it to the ropes but Guerrero grabs his feet and slingshots him throat first onto the bottom rope. Guerrero stomps away and chokes Rob with his boot. After the crowd chants "Eddie sucks" Van Dam hits shoulderblocks from the apron and goes for a sunset flip but Eddie holds onto the ropes. The ref kicks the ropes and Eddie falls backward but kicks out at 2. Eddie shouts at the referee "what are ya doing?" in regards to kicking his hands off so Van Dam sneaks up and schoolboys Guerrero for a 2. Guerrero quickly gets to his feet and quells the momentum with a clothesline. Eddie puts the boots to him and locks in a version of the anklelock as JR brings up how Flair accidentally cost Austin at Backlash. Rob makes it to the ropes so Eddie clubs away with forearms in the corner. They exchange martial arts kicks before Eddie dropkicks Rob's leg out. Eddie does a move that neither JR nor myself can figure out but its some sort of leg lock. After screaming a bit, Rob uses his other leg to kick Eddie away. Eddie continues to work over the left leg and does an elbow drop/leg lock combo. Van Dam makes it to his feet as Lawler points out there is no king of England yet. Eddie back flips over Van Dam but Rob superkicks him for his troubles. Van Dam rallies back and hits a monkey flip in the corner followed by a float-over suplex for a 2 count. Rob hits rolling thunder but gets a loooong 2 count. Eddie goes for a victory roll but is countered by Rob into a rolling slam. Rob its a second rope moonsault for a near fall. After executing a step-over heel kick, Van Dam goes upstairs but misses the 5 star frog splash. Eddie goes outside and gets the IC title but when the ref goes to take it away, Guerrero throws him down causing a disqualification. The ref goes outside and Eddie chases him around the ring as Van Dam gets up. Once the ref and Eddie get in the ring RVD hits a spinning heel kick on Guerrero followed by a back body drop kick. Rob grabs the belt and wallops Eddie with it as King cries foul. Van Dam goes upstairs and hits the 5 star as the crowd chants with him. Decent opener with the right ending in my opinion, don't want to spoil the feud on a ppv not many people will see.

Time of Match: 11:23

Winner: Rob Van Dam by disqualification (Guerrero retains)

The next segment is Terri interviewing Molly Holly and Jazz about their upcoming match with Trish and Jackie. Molly complains that England is full of trash and the divas are too because of the video that came out at the time. She says that all the divas are garbage because they take off their clothes....and this was 2002 when the women's division was still damn good. It wouldn't be for another three years before it spiraled out of control. Molly then holds up a newspaper with naked models on it and says England sucks because they allow stuff like this to be seen in public. Terri then says that she's better than Molly and Jazz because she has *drumroll* PUPPIES and then she unbuttons her shirt. King goes crazy as Molly and Jazz walk away disgusted. 

Match 2

Trish Stratus and Jacqueline vs Molly Holly and Jazz

  Molly beat up Trish before Trish's title match with Jazz at Backlash, so Trish teams with Jackie to take on the dastardly duo. The heels attack the faces as the bell rings and Jazz heaves Trish outside. Molly and Jazz hit a double suplex on Jackie. Jazz leaves and Jackie counters with an atomic drop as JR of all people hints that Molly has a big ass....so that's where it started huh? I'll get to that horrific angle in due time but for now Jackie proceeds to hammer away at Molly. They then log roll over referee Jack Doane. Molly gets up and yells at the ref so Jackie schoolboys her for 2 as Jazz breaks up the count. Molly baits Trish to get in the ring and she and Jazz double team Jackie while the ref's back is turned. They hit a double clothesline and Molly exits as Jazz covers. Jackie ducks under a clothesline and tries a crossbody but Jazz catches her in mid air. After a powerslam, Jazz hits a running leg drop and then poses for the crowd. Jackie whips Jazz in the corner but a charge eats boot. Jazz goes for another legdrop but misses, so Jackie rolls over and tags in Trish. Trish gets in a few clotheslines but Jazz counters with a jawbreaker, but Trish fires back and even brings Molly in for good measure. Trish goes to work on Molly in the corner but turns around into a spinning back kick by Jazz. Jazz locks in a double-arm chickenwing and then throws her down as King says "oh no, the puppies!". A cover gets two but angers Jazz enough to shout "COUNT A LITTLE FASTER SPOT"Jazz makes the tag to Molly who proceeds to beat her from pillar to post and hits a nice hand-spring elbow. Molly makes a cocky cover but Jackie interferes and kicks Molly in the head. JR mentions he doesnt give a damn that Molly is a virgin or not as she tags in Jazz, they do a double hair pull slam...if that's the name for it that is. Jazz then does her Mike Tyson impression by jabbing Trish in the face a few times and then does a Peter McNeely impression as Trish rallies with forearms of her own. Trish nails Molly off the apron and hits Jazz with a backslide but Jackie distracts the ref for satan knows what reason. Trish shouts invectives at the ref but Jazz rolls her up for a 2 count. Jazz misses a clothesline so Trish hits a neckbreaker. After a near fall, Trish tags in Jackie who goes to work on Jazz and hotshots her on the top rope. They trade rolling prawns before Jackie hits a ddt, as Molly breaks up the cover. Jackie nails Molly before Jazz floors her and locks in a boston crab. King starts cheering for Jackie who nearly makes it to the rope before Jazz drags her to the middle of the ring and turns it into an STF. Out of nowhere Trish hits a dropkick so all 4 get in the ring, then the faces begin to dominate. Jazz and Molly whip Jackie and Trish into each other, but they spin around and Trish hits the stratusfaction on Jazz as Jackie hits the spinning tornado ddt from the second rope on Molly. They both cover and the ref counts 1...2....3 and its over. Decent match as JR says that match was quite smashing.

Time of Match: 7:40

Winners: Jacqueline and Trish Stratus by pinfall

 The next segment is X-Pac and Scott Hall in the locker room going over how Bradshaw had pinned X-Pac on Raw the previous Monday. X-Pac says he's going to take him out the same way he took out Kane and if he doesn't, he'll never come back to England again. He tells Scott to stay put because he wants to do it on his own, so Scott says "I dunno why you wanna come back to this lousy country after you beat him anyway."

Match 3

Bradshaw vs X-Pac

  This match stems from Backlash when X-Pac cost Bradshaw his match with Scott Hall. Speaking of Hall, this would be his last show in the big time for years as he was fired within the week for the before mentioned Plane Ride From Hell. JR mentions how the nWo took out Bradshaw during the infamous tag match where Big Show rejoined the nWo to salvage the situation. X-Pac enters wearing Kane's mask and JR scoffs. They circle around as a sign pops up saying "Hall fears beer". Bradshaw heaves X-Pac around with power moves as the crowd chants "X-Pac sucks" I should point out Sean Waltman aka X-Pac was one of the biggest risk takers in the early 90's, he would do things in indy feds and early on his WWF career that Jeff Hardy would cringe at. Those same high risk moves caught up with him and he missed a total of 2 years because of a broken neck, while still a relatively speedy wrestler, he was never the same high flyer and his backstage antics didn't help either. Being arrested for stalking Chyna certainly didn't help. Meanwhile back in the ring, Bradshaw continues to pummel X-Pac with boots, forearms and a back body drop. Bradshaw hits a running clothesline in the corner as King says X-Pac called timeout. JR says there ain't no time out as Bradshaw misses a clothesline. X-Pac does his 3 kicks in the corner spot. X-Pac ducks under a clothesline and attempts a spinning wheel kick, but the future JBL catches him and slams Pac down. JR hypes the double main events as Bradshaw continues to club away at X-Pac. Bradshaw goes for another clothesline but Pac counters with a dropkick to the leg. X-Pac attacks the leg and unhooks the second turnbuckle. X-Pac rams Bradshaw's head into it a bunch of times and Bradshaw does a blade job. X-Pac stomps away at Bradshaw in the corner before pounding away on the open wound. X-Pac hits a spinning back kick and covers for a 2 count. Pac continues to punch away in mount position and then chokes Bradshaw with his boot using the rope for leverage. X-Pac continues to chop and fire away before hitting a boot to the head (yeah, yeah). X-Pac locks in a rest hold as the crowd cheers for Bradshaw. X-Pac lets him go as JR mentions that if X-Pac loses it won't cause many sleepless nights for the people of England. X-Pac starts chopping Bradshaw in the corner until Bradshaw rallies. X-Pac gets the upper hand and then climbs to the second rope. He tries the 10 punch spot but Bradshaw counters with a powerbomb. They get to their feet and Bradshaw goes on the offensive with elbows, fists and another clothesline in the corner. A Bradshaw charge in the corner eats boot but X-Pac runs into a powerslam. A cover gets a long two count and Bradshaw hits a reverse neckbreaker, then goes upstairs. He hits a flying shoulderblock and a cover gets 2 when X-Pac puts his foot on the rope. King brings up Backlash when Flair didn't see Austin's foot on the rope. X-Pac ducks under a clothesline and hits a spinning heel kick but the cover gets 2. X-Pac goes upstairs as that god damn horn blows again. Bradshaw catches him in midair and hits a fallaway slam as Scott Hall runs down to ringside. JR scoffs as Hall gets on the apron and is knocked off by Bradshaw. Bradshaw turns around and stops a running X-Pac with a big boot. Bradshaw goes to attack Hall, but Scott picks up X-Pac's nunchucks and wallops Bradshaw with them. X-Pac covers for the 1...2...NOOOO Bradshaw kicks out at 2 much to Hall's surprise. Bradshaw crawls into the corner and then gets out of the way of a bronco buster attempt. Bradshaw goes for the clothesline from hell, but X-Pac ducks and Bradshaw nails Scott Hall off the apron. Bradshaw turns around into a low blow by X-Pac, who follows it up with an X-Factor. The cover gets 1...2..3 to win the match for the nWo. Bad match but for historical purposes this was the last time Scott Hall would ever appear as an active roster member. He'd come back for the Hall of Fame and reunion shows but this was it.

Time of match: 8:47

Winner: X-Pac by pinfall

 The next segment shows Jonathan Coachman interviewing The Undertaker about his upcoming match with HHH later on. Undertaker says he beat the crap out of Hulk Hogan so he will do the same to HHH. Undertaker gives respect to HHH for coming back from the quad injury but says he's still going to pummel Trips. On to the next match...

Match 4

Booker T vs Steven Richards for the WWF Hardcore Championship

 Booker T was never known for being hardcore while Steven Richards is an ECW alumni. I should point out the 24/7 rule was still in effect and the title itself wasn't going to be around much longer after this. Buh Buh Ray Dudley was the champion going into the previous Raw and was in the middle of defense against Jazz....yes Jazz, when Richards interfered and won the title. JR mentions that Buh Buh Ray is at home with his sick mother so apparently Booker T was his replacement. Richards arm drags Booker and celebrates as JR brings up the rules....which there are none. They lock up and Booker goes on the offensive in the corner and totally beats the piss out of him. Booker T goes outside and starts throwing weapons into the ring. Steven clears the ring and starts laughing as Booker T picks up a tray, gets inside and waffles him hard in the back of the head with it. Booker goes back on the offensive and hits a back kick that the crowd pops for. He throws Richards over the top rope and shouts "get outta here!" Booker goes outside and rams Steven's head into the steel steps and then drops him stomach first into the guardrail. Booker T then pulls out a broom and whacks Richards with it. Booker T rolls Richards in who proceeds to beg for mercy before a thumb to the eye. Steven goes on the offensive with chops before Booker nails him with another spinning back kick. After a near fall, Booker scores with a suplex, goes outside and gets a trash can, then dents it over Steven's head upon returning. Steven staggers to his feet then Booker tosses him the trash can, only to superkick it into Steven's face. A near fall gets 2 and Steven rallies, only to be flapjacked by Booker. Booker continues to work over Richards before a low blow stops that. Steven picks up the serving tray and waffles Booker with it, getting a 2 count on the cover attempt. Booker T rallies with a back bodydrop but is backdropped over the top rope by Richards. Steven heaves a trash can onto Booker and makes the cover outside that gets a 2. JR throws in a European Vacation reference as Steven throws Booker T back in the ring, Steven drops an elbow and mocks Booker's taunt. They trade blows but he misses a shuffle kick and crotches himself on the top rope. Richards locks in a rest hold while the crowd chants for Booker T. JR compares Booker T to Lennox Lewis which King points out that Booker has won the WCW title more times than Lennox won the Boxing crown. Booker powers out of it and bodyslams Steven and picks up the busted up trash can but Big Stevie Cool comes back with a dropkick. Steven positions the trash can in between the top and middle turnbuckle but Booker whips him into it. They trade blows before Booker goes on the offensive with a huge spinebuster. After a near fall Booker hits another spin-kick and goes outside to get a new trash can. After putting it on Steven's head he goes upstairs and hits a missle dropkick. A cover gets 1...2...NOOO Steven kicks out and the crowd can't believe it. Booker goes for the axe kick but Steven counters with a superkick, the cover gets a lonnnnng 2 and Steven goes for a clothesline. Booker T counters the clothesline with the book end and covers for the 1...2....3 to win the match and the title. All of a sudden Crash Holly runs to the ring with referee Jimmy Korderas and rolls up Booker for the 1...2...3 to win the match and title. The 24/7 rule in effect as usual and its not over yet as Booker T nails Crash with an axe-kick 30 seconds later and covers for the 1...2...3 to win the title back. Booker celebrates but then Tommy Dreamer and Justin Credible hit the ring and attack Booker T. The ECW alumnists work over Booker before Dreamer hits a ddt. Credible pounds away on Booker as Dreamer rolls outside and gets a table, ECW style. Justin sets it up but Booker rallies and floors the both of them. The old Harlem Heat theme plays and Booker tries the spinaroonie but can't do it. All of a sudden Jazz hits the ring and low blows Booker, allowing Richards to sneak up and flapjack Booker head first on the table. The table doesn't budge so Richards does it again until finally the table crumbles and covers for the 1...2...3 to win/retain the title. After all that with Crash, the extremists and everything else Richards walks out the hardcore champion. Credible was basically a Sunday Night Heat jobber at this point until he was released in January 2003.

Time of Match: 10:42 from the final bell, not counting the run-in's

Winner: Booker T, Crash Holly, Booker T again and finally Steven Richards (New, New, New, New Hardcore champ)

The next segment is Brock Lesnar, Shawn Stasiak and Paul Heyman to hype the upcoming tag match against The Hardy Boys  Lesnar was the hot new rookie who had demolished both Hardys in single competition so they want to team up to take Brock down. Heyman tells Shawn to calm down but Shawn says him and Lesnar would be an unstoppable tag team and he tells Paul to listen to the voices talking. Heyman's look is priceless and he says "No Shawn, I'M talking" He then tells Shawn to stand the apron and do nothing, take an easy paycheck. After Shawn laughs it off, Heyman says in a harsher tone that he didn't want Stasiak but he figured he at least would be smart enough to know his role. Lesnar gets in his face and says if things don't go according to plan he'll beat up Shawn worse than he did before on Raw.

Match 5

The Hardy Boys (Matt and Jeff) vs Shawn Stasiak and Brock Lesnar with Paul Heyman

 Shawn Stasiak is another one of those second generation guys that couldn't come close to filling his father's shoes. His father was former WWWF Champion Stan "The Man" Stasiak and even though Shawn had a much better physique, his dad had enough charisma to be a draw in New York. At least Planet Stasiak is a better gimmick than Meat...and lets not go there. Meanwhile JR and King bring to light the recent neck injury Lita had suffered. Sad how she broke her neck in a tv show rather than in the ring. Lesnar makes his entrance first but Shawn sprints out and attacks The Hardy's at the opening bell. Jeff shoulder tackles Shawn but he counters later on with a spine buster. Stasiak works over Jeff and hits a sidewalk slam but the cover gets 2. Shawn locks in a rest hold as Heyman screams "SHAWN! SHAWN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING??" Jeff powers out of it and hits a sit-down jaw breaker, then tags out to Matt. Matt hits a side effect and sets himself up for the Hardy Special but Brock pulls Shawn out of the way and tags himself in. Lesnar hits shoulderblocks in the corner as Heyman shouts at Shawn. Lesnar glares at Stasiak so Matt takes advantage and pounds at Brock. Hardy goes upstairs but Brock catches him in mid-air and hits a back breaker before a whiplash slam. Lesnar begins to brutalize Matt as Heyman calls him the next big thing. Lesnar hits a huge powerslam and nails Jeff off the apron, then continues to serve Matt a beating. Brock hits two driving shoulderblocks into the corner as Stasiak taunts Matt. Brock charges but Matt moves and Lesnar goes shoulder post into the ringpost, then Shawn tags himself in. Shawn charges into a different corner but misses and Matt makes the tag to Jeff. Jeff goes to work on Shawn with clotheslines and leg-drop combo along with whisper in the wind. Jeff covers but gets 2 and then both Hardys knock Brock off the apron. Its academic from here, Matt hits the twist of fate and Jeff hits the swanton then covers for the 1..2...3 to win the match. After the match, Brock lays out both Hardys and then Stasiak for defying Heyman. Lesnar's push had just begun and this would be Stasiak's final ppv match for the company for he became a jobber until he was released from his contract in early 2003.

Time of Match: 6:47

Winner: The Hardy Boys by pinfall

   The next segment is showcasing the charity dinner from the night before. They had a jolly old auction to serve the make a wish foundation. After this, we go to Coach who interviews William Regal about his upcoming European title match against Spike Dudley. He basically runs down England and says he's the only thing to cheer for in London. After the heel promo, we go to the next match.

Match 6

Williams Regal vs Spike Dudley for the WWF European Championship

I don't understand why this match wasn't between the double main events instead of before them since nobody gave a damn about the European Championship. JR and King document how a month before on Raw, Spike won the title from Regal by using William's brass knucks. Regal starts out on offense and JR and King go over the British phrase titchy. One minute into the match Spike begins to rally with clotheslines and dropkicks. Regal begs for mercy and Spike continues to hit moves including a headbutt to the mid-section. Spike goes for the acid drop but Regal counters it and Spike lands awkwardly on his ankle. After rolling around, the trainers hustle down to ringside and take his boot off. They prepare to help Spike to the back and Regal goes out and attacks him. Regal then works over the right leg and slams him into the ropes as the crowd cheers. Regal hits a double under-arm powerbomb and covers for the 1...2...NOOO he pulls Spike up as JR scoffs. Regal goes for a suplex but Spike counters with a small package for a 1...2...3 to win the match. This match went less than 5 minutes, why wasn't it after the Austin/Show showdown?  After the match, Regal pulls out the brass knocks and waffles Spike with it as the crowd cheers again. King says Regal's arrogance led to his downfall.

Time of match:  4:54

Winner: Spike Dudley by pinfall (still European Champion)

   The next segment is a highlight package showcasing the upcoming battle between Austin and Big Show. At Backlash, Ric Flair as the guest ref accidentally cost Austin the number 1 contender slot for Judgement Day. Austin then came out on Raw and berated Flair for it, then Flair says he's gonna make it up to him by making a tag match between Austin and Bradshaw against Scott Hall and X-Pac. Later on in the night the nWo attacked Bradshaw so Flair named Big Show as his replacement. Big Show proceeded to turn on Austin and join the nWo, causing even more animosity between Austin and Flair. The addition of Big Show was pretty much the last attempt to salvage the original nWo since Hall was on his way out and Nash was out with an injured shoulder. Before the match starts, Flair runs out in a referee's shirt and then names himself guest outside referee for this upcoming double main event.

Match 7

Steve Austin vs Big Show  (Ric Flair is the special guest ref outside of the ring)

  Austin was nursing 2 bad wheels and a bad neck while Big Show was nowhere near as mobile as he used to be due to his own laziness (he admitted it years later), this could be one boring match. Nick Patrick never actually rings the bell so I'll start timing from the time Austin takes his vest off. Big Show says he's gonna break Austin in half, prompting Steve to give him the one finger salute. They circle around and lock up, and Big Show proceeds to power him around the ring. Austin does push-ups as the crowd chants "What?". They stall before locking up again, then Austin fires away with fists before Big Show stops the momentum with an elbow to the head. Austin regroups outside as the damn horn starts blowing again. 4 minutes into this thing I haven't seen one wrestling hold other than a series of collar and elbow tie ups, and Austin continues the trend with kicks to the knees before Big Show hits a clothesline. They stall for another 30 seconds before Big Show hits a series of open handed chops to the chest in the corner. Austin goes back to kicking at Big Show's knees and then floors him with a clothesline. He grabs both Big Show's legs and boots him in the berries, that's one way to take down a giant. Austin hits a series of elbows to the left leg which I guess is the first wrestling hold in the match nearly SIX MINUTES into it. Austin continues to work over Big Show's left leg and rams it into the ringpost. The fans start chanting something and King says it sounds like "You Fat Bastard", heh. Austin continues to dominate on offense before Big Show hits a headbutt out of desperation. Austin does an Undertaker style elbow drop/leglock. Show powers out of it but Austin hits a chop-block and continues to kick away at the leg. Austin ducks under a clothesline and elbow but Show powerslams him. Show pulls his singlet strap down and chops Austin in the corner before heaving him across the ring twice. Big Show stands in him then goes to work on the lower back and kidney area, finishing with a suplex. Big Show sells Austin's leg attacks from earlier and slowly chops away on Austin from the outside. Back inside Austin rallies against the lef leg but Show hits a back body drop. Big Show hits another back bodydrop while they show the prevous one at the same time. Big Show wears down Austin in the corner and goes for another but gets a boot instead. Show clothesline and tries to pin him but only gets near falls. Austin rallies with fists but Big Show goes back to work in the corner and catches him in a bear-hug. Austin bites his way out but Show hits another headbutt and covers for a near fall. Show locks in another bear-hug as the once rabid crowd begins to die down. Austin does the "fade then revive" routine and rallies out of it with headbutts to the nose. A charge in the corner eats boot and Austin goes to the second rope and hits a Lou Thez press. Austin opens up a can of whoop ass but Big Show hits a big boot to stop the momentum. Austin ducks under a clothesline and Show nails referee Nick Patrick instead. Show turns around into a stunner by Austin but there's no one to count the fall. All of a sudden Scott Hall and X-Pac run out to ringside and prevent Flair from counting out Show. Flair beats them both up and chases them to the back as Austin is pissed Flair deserted him. Show gets up and goes for a Chokeslam but Austin counters it, so Show big boots him instead. Big Show hits another headbutt as Kevin Nash appears from the crowd and gets in the ring with X-Pac's nunchucks. Austin boots Nash and then low blows Show, then stuns them both. Patrick wakes up and Austin covers for the 1...2...3 to win the match. Flair runs back to ringside and chases Nash away with a chair. Austin does his beer bash celebration and after a while Flair picks up the mic and starts butt-kissing Austin. Austin then grabs the mic and goes off on how bygones should be bygones and as they start downing the suds, Austin stuns him as the crowd cheers. Saw that coming a mile away.

Time of Match: The bell never rang so an unofficial 17:30

Winner: Steve Austin by pinfall

 The next segment is a highlight package of how Undertaker cost HHH the title at Backlash and how they're gonna get it on one more time tonight. Only problem was hardcore fans had already seen this match a year earlier at Wrestlemania so it was nothing new. After HHH had came to Raw and beat up Undertaker, Taker got his revenge by costing HHH and number 1 contender's match against Chris Jericho. Which means Jericho had to job to Hogan on Smackdown at one point or another.  Lets send it to our second main event....

Match 8

Triple H vs The Undertaker

HHH is supposedly on Smackdown but is allowed to appear on this Raw ppv. The crowd cheers very loud for The Undertaker despite him being a heel, or maybe its piped in chants. Howard Finkel announces that HHH is 272 lbs...keep in mind he was about 240-245 in his early WWF days. HHH charges and they slug it out to start. HHH hits a flying knee and a back bodydrop then clotheslines him over the top rope to the floor. Outside, Taker works over HHH but Trips shoves him into the ringpost. HHH goes back on offense and throws him back inside, where Taker counters with a clothesline. After a near fall, Taker goes to work in the corner with fists and hits another clothesline. Taker goes for an arm wrench as King marvels at Triple H's physique, then Taker goes upstairs but HHH blocks the Old School attempt. JR says "HHH jerking The Undertaker off the top rope!" Take away "the top rope"  out of it and there's a soundbyte that people would pay for. HHH unloads with fists and hits a snap suplex then hits an elbow drop. A near fall gets 2 and Taker begs for mercy...then throws trips through the ropes to the outside. HHH rams Taker into the US announce table then clotheslines him. Taker climbs onto the apron and HHH slugs him a few times before motioning that he's gonna throw Earl Hebner over the top rope. Taker hits a stun gun and clotheslines HHH in the corner. Taker places HHH's head outside the ring and hits the chest area with a forearm. Taker turns him over and hits a leg drop on the back of HHH. Taker charges in the corner but eats elbow and HHH rallies with punches. Taker ducks under a clothesline and hits a chop block, then goes to work on the left leg. King brings up the quad injury as Taker hits the elbow to the leg/leglock combo. HHH uses his right leg to counter and rallies again and whips Taker into the ropes....which collapse on impact. The ring crew has some splainin' to do after the show's over, good thing this happened in the main event and not earlier. Earl Hebner checks on the broken rope as Taker lowblows HHH, BRILLIANT! Taker drops an elbow and covers for 2, then locks in a rest hold. 45 seconds later HHH powers out of it and hits a back suplex, then they do a double clothesline spot. The damn horn blows as they slowly rise to their feet, Taker goes for a big boot but HHH moves out of the way. Taker lands sack first on the broken rope and HHH slugs away at him. HHH hits a swinging neckbreaker but Taker doesn't sell it, so HHH does it again. HHH hits an Arn Anderson style spinebuster but only gets a long 2 count. Taker blocks a pedigree attempt and hits a big boot then calls for the chokeslam. HHH counters the chokeslam with a sloppy looking ddt but only gets 2 on the cover. Taker whips HHH into the corner where the steel part that holds the turnbuckle in place flies off and clangs against the steps. This ring is all messed up now so they better finish up before someone gets hurt. HHH hits the knee lift, but Taker counters the pedigree with a chokeslam. Taker takes too long to cover so HHH kicks out at 2, then Undertaker rolls outside and gets a steel chair. Hebner tries to pull the chair away so when Taker gets control, HHH hits a running high knee into the chair. HHH covers but Taker kicks out at 2, then hits a ddt upon standing but gets a near fall of his own. Taker signals for the dragon sleeper but HHH counters with a clothesline. Taker whips HHH into another corner and breaks that part off too. Taker hits snake eyes on HHH in the broken turnbuckle but HHH counters with another high knee. HHH hits the pedigree and covers for the 1...2...3 to win the match. Wow....Taker was going to wrestle for the WWF title in less than 3 weeks and they put HHH over, go figure. JR shills the match as something special even though it was the same style as the one at Wrestlemania 17 a year earlier in front of a hell of a lot more people. Still, a good match is a good match whether its in front of no one or everyone.

Time of Match: 14:29

Winner: HHH by pinfall

  

I know this was supposed to be a British skybox only ppv, but the match quality was UGGGGGGLYYY. The opener was good, the women's match was ok and Booker T was good....it was all downhill from there. I loved the Heyman and Stasiak part but the match itself wasn't that great.  I will say no matter what was going on or who was involved, the fans were always annoyingly loud, but that's a good thing since it means they're actually interested in the product. The next British ppv would be Rebellion in late October which would feature only Smackdown stars. Insurrextion was completely meaningless in terms of Judgement Day hype but it was at least something to present to the UK. Up next is Judgement Day 02.